Sunday, September 23, 2012
I know it has been such a long time since I have posted, that you guys thought I was living under a rock or just fell off the face of the earth or something. First off, no...I'm still here. I hope to get back to writing regularly again now, but some crazy shit has gone down in my life that I've had to process and cope with, and that I'm still processing and coping with it if I'm going to be totally honest about it but I thought it was time to reach out to you guys and just let you know what's going on. A few weeks ago my husband told me that he didn't want to be with me anymore. He wanted to separate and to move out immediately. I was in shock, I had no idea that this was coming. I tried to see if he would go to marriage counseling, but he absolutely refused. He started looking for an apartment, but had to continue living at the house for 2 weeks before he could move out - talk about awkward? Yeah, big time. He wanted to let me have the house, which is great I guess but he was in a HUGE hurry to sign separation papers. I mean, he started talking about us going to see an attorney together the night he told me he wanted to leave, and was crying and just trying to process what was happening. I did tell him to back the fuck off, how in the hell was I supposed to deal with the idea of an attorney when I was barely processing what was going on? We did go talk to an attorney about a week later, to tell him what we wanted in our agreement. He pretty much gave me the house, which is our main asset. We don't have kids, and he can't have our 60 lb dog at his apartment so I keep Sunshine. We signed our agreement this past Monday, and he moved into his apartment on Wednesday. He is still moving stuff out of here, so I'm still kind of trying to put the house back together with the furniture I have left but I can't quite do it since he's still not done. I've had a few breakdowns, but overall I'm doing okay. I don't know if I'm still in shock, or if the things I need to do around the house are keeping me busy, but I'm, doing ok. Lots of my friends call me, facebook me, text me, email me, etc. to make sure I'm okay. My parents are being very supportive as well. This is my 2nd marriage to fail, but they aren't critizing me at all for anything. Anyway, that's the condensed version of what's up with me. Keep me in your thoughts and prayers. I am still coping with this the best I can, some days are good....some are not. Hopefully as time goes by, the good days will outweigh the bad. This is an 8 year marriage, an 11 year relationship that I'm having to let go of. It definitely can't happen overnight. Thanks for listening, errr reading, and hopefully I'll be able to find some inspiration and begin blogging again regularly.